Retreat

I recommend retreats.  I recommend space and time for anyone to be with themselves.  I got back from a stint in France where I did a lot of that.  Less art and more walks.  Less social and more solo.  It was a wonderful trip, but at the same time...  There were lots of walks to the local church to pray.  Lots of looking around and wondering what I should do when I go back.  On the plane ride home I started to write about everything in my heart.  I didn't stop writing from about 4 hours.

Toward the end of the trip I had learned some things, some of which I plan to put into a book or something of the sort.  I relished those morning walks the most, for they gave me those lessons.  I drank them in, knowing the walks would soon end.  Going back is always bittersweet.  You're usually going home to people and places you love dearly.  This time around I was returning to my childhood home, no job, clean slate.  It felt different from my other return flights while traveling.  I was so excited to go back to a home that had been a part of my heart for so long, but when I got back....I realized there was a new person who was trying to fit in her old bedroom.  There were new desires and new ways of operating around people.   Something didn't match.

What do I want to create?

Who is this new woman and what does she need?

I walked by this sign every day.  It's magical to me.

We always think we're more solid than we are, don't we?  We always think that being stoic and non-responsive to life changes is being "strong".  

It's different this time, but it's also the same.  Old patterns are hard to break, but I'm much more aware of them than I ever was before.  Curious, even.  I have several practices for this time in my life, but one of them is to recall a quote that's helped carry me in the past:

"To pay attention, this is our endless and proper work." -Mary Oliver

I will do this.  I will do this forever! ;)

Warmth and light,

Annie

Autumn's Voice

I was clicking around online, researching rituals for Autumn. I'm big into rituals these days. As someone who needs to remember how to create more space and pause, rituals offer a meditative activity and bring me back to center. And I'm often teetering off center, folks. I figured there had to be an event in the Bay area for the Autumn Equinox, so I looked on Eventbrite, Meetup, etc.

There was, but not as many as you'd think. In fact, I only found one real celebration of Mabon (the ancient Harvest Festival) and it was a small group of people gathering via meetup.com in the outer Richmond district in San Francisco. Long story short, the event was wonderful, the people were kind and so warm. We had a very special circle that night and made way for this season of gratitude and loss. We danced, shared stories, then parted ways.

The delicate rituals insisted I think about how I want to approach this season, and with all the changes in my job and living situation lately, it was quite meaningful. I was up early this morning, having slept only 5 hours, refreshed but still very contemplative (not a bad thing, I think!)

I thought back to my yoga teacher training this last Summer, and a few concepts floated to the top. Autumn's voice was loud and clear. I can see her message in the leaves, in my garden, in my heart, and in the collective yearnings. Apadigraha, she says. Saucha, she insists. Santosha, she states.

Santosha is...

"Being content with what is". I feel like this Niyama is the true practice of gratefulness. To look around you and be satisfied, in fact, even ecstatic, is a rich way to live. The earth gives us everything. Food, resources, shelter, water, beauty... and the planet is not really asking anything of us. We're the one's who made money. But the earth don't care. She gives and nourishes. And especially this time of year, we can literally see the gold around us. The abundance of apples, berries, squash, nuts.

Apadigraha

My favorite Yama, although I feel like of dirty saying that in front of the other Yamas. Apadigraha means, "Non- grasping". I was thinking about the bold autumn leaves that are starting to fall- these dead things that the trees don't need anymore. they release them into the wind and they compost back to the earth. During this season, I am deeply reminded that I have lots to let go of and that it inevitable for growth. The leaves comfort me when I feel uneasy about this process, because I turn my attention to spring, when new, supple leaves grow, and I see the beauty in this death because it is followed by rebirth.

Saucha

Another Niyama meaning, "Purity". Autumn is a cleansing season. No doubt about this. When you let go and focus on the abundance you have around you, you make space for light matter, pure matter, things that fill up your soul. I like the practice of Saucha, most of all, although all the darn pumpkin bread and PSLs are making my cry inside a bit right now. They hurt so good. Still, physically clearing my studio and creative space has made a big impact on how I feel when I work/paint. And physically clearing my body is bringing clarity to my mind. Meditation tops them all in my book, and all three have made it into my morning routine for the past month.

I'm letting some leaves go- it's time. I invite you to do the same. One ritual we did for Mabon was to write something we want to release onto a leaf. We then flung it into the wind!

I wish you all a wonderful Autumn! Peace.

Annie

Submit, Submit!

Some lovely folks have asked me about my Kickstarter campaign. I remember reaching out to some authors who'd funded their projects with great success, and their advice was very helpful. I gleaned a few ideas from their process, but I want to share what I did and what I would do NEXT time to make it more fun. Your first Kickstarter can seem overwhelming (I know mine was!), but you have way more support around you than you know!

Kickstarter

• Give yourself 8-10 months to complete your project if you need it. The funding from Kickstarter can really help you move through the production and distribution process with all the resources you need. If you try to produce first, it might take you longer than you anticipated. You might cut out things that you really wanted but didn't think you needed because you wanted to get the product out on time. Go for what YOU want. You deserve it. And that's what Kickstarter is for.
• Ask for help. Reach out with facebook, text messages, emails, and ask friends to be fellow messengers. Post updates during the Kickstarter every 4 days or so to keep momentum and show your excitement (because you WILL be excited!)
• Include a 1 minute video talking about the project. People love to see your face. Include pictures and content in your campaign. The more info and visuals the better because it shows people you're serious and have produced an idea that is clearly crafted.

Once You're Funded

• Post updates about what you're working on every month.
• Create social media accounts and share the kickstarter updates on these accounts to get content going in there. (You don't need to do more than this for now I think)
• Look into hiring a social media person (maybe there's a company that can set you up and provide a plan).
• Simple website (look into wix.com, squarespace.com). Costs around $100. Include your mission on this website and some photos of you. Nothing fancy, but this is your portfolio essentially.
• Purchase ISBN # ($35)
• Sellers Permit.
• Find a good Printer. They might seem hard to find, but I recommend Codra Inc in Irvine, or Worzalla publishing.
• Pay attention to detail when checking proofs of your book. It's up to you to make it beautiful. Take as long as you need to get it right. * Hire someone to layout the book if you need it. Ususally printers will know of, or have someone on staff, who can help you do this.

Ready to Distribute and Sell!

• Set up a Square account or some way to collect $$ other than through Amazon and Etsy. If you do events, you'll need this. Square is great and free to use.
• Create an Amazon sellers account so your book is online. Etsy is good, too, but Amazon lets people leave reviews.
• Set up a distribution party to mail out books for your Kickstarter contributors. It can be a daunting task, so make it fun and treat your friends to some pizza while you package the goods!
• Remember that freight delivery will cost extra when you deliver to a residential address. Some will not deliver to a residence at all. Easy to work around, just ask questions and sort it out before the books are on their way.

Additional Ideas

• Go to book fairs!
• Farmers markets.
• Write blogs about how the book is influencing and inspiring kids.
• Ask friends to write about it, too!
• Create post cards (moo.com) and stickers (stickermule.com) to send to people.
• Share, share, share!! And most of all, enjoy tha fact that your project has come to be! That is an amazing feat and truly a dream come true, so celebrate!

More questions?  Just let me know- drop me an email or tweet anytime!

Finding your base

It's been a busy Summer. I wrote some about my travels a bit, so you know I've been pretty mobile. But with all the travel AND yoga teacher training, AND extra freelance gigs, I've pushed the writing and personal illustration off to the side.

I think the Asilomar SCBWI conference broke my heart a little, to be honest. As a visual artist, you constantly hear that you'll be a 'starving artist'. It's like everyone just loves to tell you this. Like they're helping you in some way. The speakers at that conference pounded this into our skulls to the point of causing nightmares (literally I had nightmares at that conference, haha). I'd had enough. It got to me because I beleived it! I've always listened to people and what they think.

But it's time to beleive what I think. I believe that you need to do what you absolutely love, and ignore everyone else's comments about it. Yes, you will have to make ends meet, and it might be by waiting tables or working a desk job, but enjoy every moment that you get to write about your beloved characters, or paint the magical worlds that pour out of your soul.

I'm saying this to myself as well, of course. I need to hear it myself most of all! Don't listen to the haters. Life it too damn short!

So I met with my writing group and realized it had been too long. The muse started poking me from inside recently (like she always does- right in the heart bone), saying, "Annie! You're not paying attention to me! I'm right here."

Time to find my base. Write it out. Make a schedule. You can't do everything, but you can do what you love if you choose to!

Truly,

Annie

Canelés and Bordeaux

I am a changed woman.

Now, whether I've been changed for the better, that's for others to decide. I was right when I thought I would love France. I really loved France. The countryside, the art, the bread, and the language all cast their spells on me. Don't get me started. I couldn't communicate much more than "Parlez-vous anglais?" and "Je ne sais pas parler francais", but I lovingly listened to people speak to me in French. The sounds are like strokes on a canvas of the most beautiful colors.

Anyway. I digress. Bordeaux.

If you want to see a city with pleanty to do but still managable and peaceful then visit Bordeaux. The architecture is a light sand color, with tasteful but glamerous ornimentation and sculpture. It's lovely and grand, but still easy on the eyes, lot too busy but never plain. Le Jardin Public is picturesque with families eating their baguettes and strawberries as the children run around in their sun hats. Renoir would approve.

One thing that's very popular there are these caneles de Bordeaux. They're little custardy treats that are like nothing I've had before. My wonderful couchsurfer host made them with me, so when I got home I was naturally eager to try again. Challenge: make a vegan version. Oh goodness, but that's blasphemy! The French love their creams and cheese.

I know. But I'm determined because I really prefer to procure ethically produced foods when possible, and I think plants rock. So, after trying a completely vegan version with tofu and soymilk and all that junk, I tried a version that uses local eggs and non dairy options. The caneles turned out excellent, and I feel fairly comfortable eating a canele that includes a neighborhood egg. It workes way better than tofu and is less processed, to be honest.

If you'd like to try this recipe, you will need a canele mold, which you can find at Sur La Table or Williams & Sonoma, but not Target. Sorry.

Ingredients:

• 1/2 liter non-dairy milk
• 1/2 tsp vanilla extract or a vanilla bean
• 2 tabelspoons vegan butter

Bring these ingredients to a boil in a saucepan then remove and let cool slightly.

• 1 cup flour
• 1 cup brown sugar
• 2 egg yolks (beaten)
• 2 eggs

Mix flour and sugar together, then add in eggs. Pour this into the saucpan and mix gently together forming a pancake-like batter. Let this mixture cool to warm or room temperature, then add 3-4 tablespoons of rum. Store this mixture in the fridge overnight to let all the flavors mature. Yum!

The next day (or the day after) preheat your oven to 495F. If you found silicone molds, then you don't need to grease them. Just pour the batter, filling the molds to about 3/4 of the way, then place them in the oven. After 5 minutes, turn down the oven to 350F and bake for another 45-60 minutes. You want to make sure the caneles are brown on the outside. In the inside they will still be soft and custardy and ...oh my goodness so good.

Let me know what you think! I'm still working on this recipe since I am no Julia Child. But practice makes... well....more practiced, I think.

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I plan on visiting Bordeaux again soon. I was only there for a day and a half, and there really are so many beautiful corners to explore. My favorite was Darwin, a series of old warehouses that have been converted to art studios and skating rinks. And the river makes for a nice bike loop, with lots of places to stop along the way. I'm taking french lessons to prepare. I warned you- I'm obsessed!